Gays are encouraged to adopt kids

They'd wanted families, had been willing to change diapers and be soccer dads for once-unwanted children.

On Father's Day, gay dads from across Southern California gathered with their kids to call upon other gays to take in or adopt foster children.

"We are trying to promote to the gay and lesbian community ... that it is possible for them to have families," said Rich Valenza, co-president of the Pop Luck Club, a Los Angeles-based group of gay dads, which hosted the event. "And they'll make good dads.

"They have the wherewithal. The heart. The house. And the love to share."

The Father's Day Celebration at The Abbey, one of the hippest gay bars in West Hollywood, was billed as the region's largest foster parent recruitment drive within the LGBT community.

More than 120 parents and their kids lined up for pancakes at the Old World-style club to celebrate the joys of fatherhood.

In addition, such signs as "Share your heart, share your home" encouraged would-be foster dads to contact the Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services.

On any given day, the agency has more than 500 foster children in need of safe and secure homes.

"We need families," said Bryan Miller, a DCFS supervising children's social worker, on hand to speak with prospective dads. "And the gay and lesbian community is a community full of untapped resources.

"They make great dads. And great moms."

It was a

dozen years ago that gay couples could legally adopt children, or list on birth certificates both parent's names.

It can take months - or years - to take in or adopt a foster child, say supporters. And the process can be difficult.

"For any parent willing to adopt a foster child, it's a difficult road, and often a long and arduous one," said Tannia Esparza, a family advocate at the Los Angeles Gay & Lesbian Center. "But for the parents ... it's worth it."

Parenting has been an especial boon for John Ireland and his partner, Duncan, who were married 18 years ago by an Episcopal priest, after deciding to have a family.

Six years ago, they adopted Emma, a foster child who was four months old, after taking parenting classes. Last week, they both attended her kindergarten graduation.

"We knew how to burp," said Ireland, 47, of Los Angeles. "We knew that we would sacrifice certain things, like movie nights, or going out to dinner after a hard day's work.

"We're more concerned with making lunches, and doing laundry, like any family out there. But that sacrifice isn't a sacrifice - because it opened up a whole new set of rewards."

Like the indescribable feeling of holding a child and watching it fall asleep in your lap, Ireland said. "There's nothing better in life."

Valenza said nearly two-thirds of the gay dads of Pop Luck Club had adopted children, with the rest having children mostly via surrogate moms.

Five years ago, he and his companion, Jared Gee, had felt something missing in their lives. So they adopted a foster boy and girl whose parents had been homeless downtown.

Now they've become Taekwondo dads.

"Christmas. No kids around the tree. I wanted to raise children," Valenza said. "Kids are tough. But the rewards are really phenomenal - to see their growth, to see their change, to see them evolve.

"It was what I was hoping for."

Source: http://www.dailynews.com/news/ci_18312655?source=rss

Christina DaRe Rozonda Thomas Audrina Patridge Autumn Reeser Jamie Gunns